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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27753034">came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/templeofshame/pseuds/templeofshame'>templeofshame</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>2009 Era (Phandom), Introspection, M/M, and lack thereof, internet safety</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 22:42:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>768</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27753034</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/templeofshame/pseuds/templeofshame</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan considers safety, the internet, and rules he wants to break.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dan Howell/Phil Lester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>50</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>just for the record, i don't recommend dan's choices. luckily we know it worked out for him. and thanks, sarah and liza.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Protective” is not a word Dan ever would have used for his parents. Of Adrian, maybe. But not of him.</p><p>And maybe he’s taken it for granted, that apathy, when it’s meant he can stumble home as late as he pretends he wants, or skive off work, or hole up in his room avoiding humanity. As long as he does his chores and holds onto his job this time, it’s fine.</p><p>But of course his mum’s seen some shit on the news that has her concerned. Not about the people he’s been drunk off his ass with more than a few times or who’ve made not-so-veiled threats, but about Phil. Because Phil’s on the internet, and “you can’t trust people there.” As if Dan doesn’t know the internet. As if he’s the sort of sheltered child to trust anyone who’s nice to him. Maybe she hasn’t noticed that he’s not.</p><p>But she’s right that he trusts Phil. Dan’s heard all the horror stories, and he should know better than to trust anyone, but he can’t help it. And with the way it’s gone with people IRL, from school or the neighborhood or mates of mates... Phil could hardly be worse. Dan sees his unedited face much too often for him to be the creepy old man who seems to be the internet bogeyman. A few years older, sure, but Dan’s seen that guy lurking in the shadows at clubs where he’d never admit to going, and he’s never found a hint of that in Phil even at his boldest. (Dan likes his boldest.)</p><p>His mum has seen Phil’s face too, in a couple videos well before Phil ever messaged back. But still, to her, it’s “just dodgy,” it “could be dangerous,” even for the (straight) son she thinks she has. She questions Phil’s motives, why he would even want to talk to Dan, and it stings. Of course he’s asked himself that question, he’s spent plenty of time in disbelief. But even his own mum can’t see what’s so special about him, why someone like Phil would care to talk to him as a person and not a target. </p><p>But Phil does. He talks to Dan because he wants to, because he likes it. Not in a polite way, or a convenient way, but in a way where they lose track of time chatting, where Phil whines when Dan has to go to work. Phil’s had a million chances to walk away politely and he hasn’t. Dan’s let Phil get to know him more than he ever should—that’s a big danger of the internet, just enough distance for that vulnerability to feel less scary—and Phil still comes back.</p><p>On Dan’s screen. Online. That’s where they’re at, their safe space. Where the bubbling implications of how Dan feels, of what Phil hints at, don’t need to have Implications. None of it has to live in the real world. Not the one that hurls insults and worse, that judges even without knowing the depth of judgeability there.</p><p>And Dan’s not ready to change that. But… he wants their world to be real. He wants to break the first rule of internet stranger danger. He wants to meet Phil.</p><p>Logically, Dan knows that Phil could be a cannibal. He could be a much better actor than in that Viking movie; he could be something different in person. He <i>is</i> older, with fans, and he knows Dan’s one. He could hurt Dan in more than a few ways. But Dan doesn’t care. He almost has to try, when he’s alone at night and starting to spiral, to worry about Phil that way. </p><p>It’s just, plenty of people have hurt him, and Phil… takes him away from that. To a safe place. Where he can open up, be whatever blobby mess of a human he is, and Phil doesn’t just accept it. He <i>likes</i> it. Likes Dan. </p><p>And so Dan, sue him, trusts. Phil could be a cannibal, could be luring Dan out to be axe-murdered, but Dan feels safe with him. For the first time in… God. Maybe he’s better off not thinking that through. But the fact is, his mum doesn’t give him that anymore, and his dad, well. There’s no <i>protecting</i> happening. </p><p>Restricting, maybe, but he’s eighteen now. Fuck that. He works, he can save up and travel across the country, alone, to meet an older man from the internet. He can know the horror stories, the real risks, and gladly take them. And feel <i>safe</i> taking them. Safer than he feels in Wokingham, maybe safer than ever.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>come say hi on <a href="https://templeofshame.tumblr.com/post/636038144378142720/came-in-from-the-wilderness-a-creature-void-of">tumblr</a>.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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